Fitfully and Gradually.

“Whoa!” This might be the right word to say to the disciples at this juncture in their journey. Their response to Jesus is definitely premature: “Now we realize that you know everything. . . . Because of this we believe that you came from God.” These first disciples had to learn what each new generation of believers and each individual believer must learn: that belief in Jesus is not that easily attained. Sure, there are and have always been some who, like the disciples here, feel they have achieved in one fell swoop a pure and total belief. Let us grant that one or two people (possibly St. Paul) have had this experience. For most of us, as for the disciples, the required total saving trust in the Lord is only fitfully and gradually gained.

The belief in the Lord that saves us and even cushions us against despair comes about only by being tested in life’s every circumstance. It is tested by prosperity and poverty, by success and sorrow, each in different ways. Like the old Israel, we must pass through the waters and the desert of disappointment, betrayal, grief, loss, fear, numbing dryness—one or some of these—to come to the promised land of genuine belief. Our awareness that in so many ways our faith is provisional and not fully developed gives us good reason to pray to the Holy Spirit for this gift of faith as probably the most basic gift of all.

Fr. Don Talafous, adapted from Homilies for Weekdays. Taken from Give Us This Day.

Fr. Don Talafous, OSB, is a member of St. John’s Abbey in Collegeville, Minnesota, and alumni chaplain for St. John’s University. His Daily Reflection can be found at www.saintjohnsabbey.org/reflection.